There goes 2007, fallin off in the distance…….it’s all over! Let it go Jenn let it go baby, You got ‘Sex & The City’ The Movie to think about.
Yes this is it, the end, finito, all she wrote. The last day of 2007 or as I like to call it, the year of Britney Spears’s hairless wonder…..and I ain’t talkin about her head, mmmm-kaaaaay. My New Years wish is that you all have a grand ole’ saddidy time where ever you decide to spend it. Whether at a fabulous soiree eating some pretentiously disgusting crap-lookin’ paste on a flavorless waffer guffawing with beautiful snobs or destroying your liver tissue at a sleezy bar before passing out shortly after midnight in a puddle of your own sick(how chic…..how classi), I really just want you to be safe. I believe that even if you had a not-so-great year, I believe that if you just don’t give up, fabulous things are on your horizon………you now owe me a vital organ as payment for that Maya Angelou moment, gimme dat!
-Z’maji, “Let’s pray GOD makes Beyonce ’sat’ down & rest her lace front wig in 08′ before she has a freak out moment and we lose her too!”
REEEEEE-CAAAAAP!!!
Rihanna(best dressed) hired a competent stylist & made me tingle on the inside part
Purple was no longer just for pedophilic dinosaurs
Becks & Posh came to the U.S. and nobody cared but me *pout*
Patent leather was suitable to wear even if you weren’t a whip weilding freak
My “Bran-Bran-Nanna-Nut-Muffin Head” was aquitted of false charges
And big sexy brought it home for the thick girls, GET IT J.HUD!
And a really righteous & fabuluss brotha, named Z’maji, with an odd & questionable sense of humor and an obsession with fashion started an awesome blog and met some cool people. See ya on the other side.
Swarovski Crystal Cocktail Ring by Erickson Beamon
By popular demand, and by popular demand I mean 3 people, I will now put you up on game, in accessories of course. Your ensemble isn’t complete until you’ve got your sexy party shoes, 1000 watt blinding blingage & a killer bag with all your beauty essentials tucked away in style……..oh yea, and since it’s 2007 & people don’t seem to know what celibacy is, your prophylactic(condom dummy). Your accessory choice WILL make or break your outfit and WILL CAUSE ME TO RELENTLESSY INSULT YOU IF I SEE YOU IN THE STREET LOOKIN HOMELESS AND THRIFTY. Now do as I say and go get your incidentals…………..accessories dummy
-Z’maji, “Oooo, shiny….”
Alexander McQueen Stripped Leather Party Pumps
Christian Louboutin Lopono Shoe Boots (Bootis)
Astrid Multi-Charm Necklace by Lee Angel
Erickson Beamon Stone Embellished Wrist Cuff
Fendi Tortoiseshell Box Clutch
Oscar de la Renta Patent Leather Peep-Toe Sandals
Brown/White Zebra Oversized Clutch by Jimmy Choo
Roberto Cavalli Gold-Tone Butterfly Belt in Tanned Leather
Miu Miu Leather Shoulder Bag
Roberto Cavalli Acrylic Floral Engraved Bangle
Paillette Embellished Peep-Toes by Roberto Cavalli
Karta shift dress with multifaceted stone embellishments – http://eluxury.com
Whether she was sworn enemy or blood relative, you clowned the hostess of that Christmas party you crashed by showing up looking so haute she choked on her martini olive, passed out and had to be revived by the fat dude that was suckin down shrimp and holiday cookies at the snack table. Well if THAT was her reaction then, she’ll go into cardiac arrest when she sees your New Years 08′ ensemble, we must be consistent musn’t we? New Years Eve is always such a memorable night so celebrate it with a memorable outfit. Everyone in the room should scramble to kiss you when the ball drops(tee hee “ball”, I’m so mature). Bring in NYE 08′ with glitz and class and an involuntary manslaughter charge under your belt…..how classy……how chic.
-Z’maji, “Freek-Um, Freek-Um!!!”
Strapless silk chiffon Alberta Ferretti ombre dress
Tibi sequin striped t-shirt dress
Pedro Garcia’s Nancy glitter pump
Empire waisted Mint jodi arnold tiered silk satin strapless with ruched chiffon bust
Ruched beaded clutch by Fendi
Roberto Cavalli Cleopatra gown with v-neck & smocked boddice in green metallic lurex
Emilio Pucci sequin embellished wool coat with beaded toggle belt
‘See’ by Chloe shift in gold floral jacquard
Roberto Cavalli satin clutch with gold & jewel serpent embellisment
Christian Louboutin “Bling Bling” party peek-aboos
Metallic brocade pant by Lela Rose
Matthew Williamson empire hand painted full length gown
That jolly old porker is “Crankin That Soulja Boy” with the Angels so he can’t possibly know if you’ve been bad or good…………..Jesus, however, is another story. Don’t worry though you can still preserve your virtue(that ship has sailed, crashed & sunk anyway) and look like a freshly wrapped Christmas gift, the gift you SAID you were taking to the homeless shelter but decided to keep for yourself, you trash. Z’maji hopes you’ll be styled to perfection for those Holiday parties that you’ll be arriving to fashionably late or crashing b’cuz you have to show up the hostess for daring to not invite you. Here’s your chance to ”accidently break one of her china plates on purpose”. Remember, Tis the season to raise hell while looking better than others.
-Z’maji, “Yea, uh, your Christmas party is lame so I’m takin some presents, mm-kay”
Simon Webbe of the British boy-band phenomenon, Blue, attended the UK premiere of “I Am Legend”. The R&B sensation man-diva’d his way down the red carpet bedazzled in a finely tailored, copper colored blazer with studded motorbike gloves and his signature, slightly askew mohawk, I love when artist take risks. This of course is no shock b’cuz he always shows up polished and prepared in trendy, masculine ensembles, he has such great style. Someone has a gay stylist……………….and that GIRl is fabulouuuuuuusss! Check out his performance of ’The Killers’ hit “When You Were Young” at the ICA.
-Z’maji, “No, No…..he’s not gay, he’s just British”
The beautiful toffee colored sensation that is Jurnee Smollett of Eve’s Bayou & Cosby fame is a grown woman……..I mean she pays bills and everything. The December issue of Vanity Fair features the thespian work of art in its “The Vanities Girls” feature as a 50’s pinup girl a la Marilyn Monroe with billowing skirt and never-ending legs to match. The Glamourista is currently promoting her return to film in the Oprah Winfrey produced and Denzel Washington directed, “The Great Debaters”. God Bless Oprah Winfrey and the wedded relations that produced such a tasty treat.
Oh to be a red bathing suit huggin’ on Gwen Steffani’s tender parts. I’ve been a Gwen fan since I was 11 years old and she was singin, “I’m walkin in the spider webs/Leave a message and I call you back”……….good times……good times. The Ska princess is actually a legitimate designer now with a high end line, whose runway show was critically acclaimed at Mercedes Benz Fashion Week 07′ in New York. Now check out the new advert for the premiere fragrance named, “L”. The spicy concoction blends Leafy Water Hyacinth, White Freasia, Rose and my favorite Frangipani Blossom among other delicate ingredients. The collection offers the fragrance in 1, 1.7, and 3.4 ounce bottles, along with shower gel, body lotion, and a solid perfume compact. Such a “Sweet Escape”.
Oh my God I’m so serious, I got the email today from Jesus, your cat’s as good as dead. Anyhoosits, HintMagazine’s online site has a great new feature on some fresh new models that are invading the industry. That’s right, more lovelies that say yes to hunger and no to a hearty late night run to FatBurger for triple meat, triple cheese, and chili covered taters(Mmmm, Cholesterol). Check out these exciting additons to Fashiondom.
WARNING: DON’T PLAY THIS SONG IF YOU ARE HEARTBROKEN, DEPRESSED, MOURNING THE LOSS OF A COUTURE ARTICLE OF CLOTHING, or SIPPIN ON CHEAP WINE FROM A BOX/MALT LIQUOR IN A PAPER BAG(how elegant)
In spite of all of the TomFoolery, the BallyHoo……..the pure unadulterated shenanigans, I just love my Amy Winehouse. This song in particular cuts through me, into my bruised & longing soul….. deep inside,y’know…….where the Cream Fillin’ is. In all sincerity, I really hope she gets it together. I’d like to goof on that B’Hive for many more years to come, I mean, whats in there Amy?
-Z’maji, “Hey, Where’s the Cream Fillin?…………what do you mean the big girl ate it?”
Note: Hey Slaus this is for you…….I know how much you enjoyed the last Becks post, HA!
Here’s more pictures from ‘Becks’ Emporio Armani ads. These are the only ones that I was able to find, in spite of the fact that I’ve combed these here ’innanets’ for more. So please stop blowin up my Inbox asking me to look for more pictures YE THE SICK & SEXUALLY FRUSTRATED, Yahoo is starting to send emails threatening my life and I can’t die yet, I haven’t even met Valentino.
I know Amy, I was shocked as well Boo! Fashion Demi-God(forgive me Jesus)& master keeper of CHANEL, Karl Lagerfeld, revealed last week that Amy Winehouse is his new muse…….I’ll give ya’ll a minute to hack up the gum which I’m sure you’ve begun to choke on. He’s so taken with her that the models in last weeks Lagerfeld London show, which was a part of the Paris-Londres, Metiers d’Art Collection(I don’t kno what that means but it sounds classy), came down the runway in Amy inspired duds and Beehives stacked to heaven. He told reporters(hold on to your lace fronts) and I quote, “Amy is the new Brigitte Bardow,” end quote. I actually dig her fresh take on Doo-Wop style and the grundgy edge she’s put with it(I really love her a friggin lot), but Brigitte Bardow………..that’s like saying that Oprah is the new Jesus, close but oh so far away.
-Z’maji, “Quick, hide the booze and extra curricular narcotics”
Becks is a great reason to hate yourself and run to the bathroom and slit your wrists, as he reminds you that you will never……ever…….EVER, look like this. In his new Armani underwear ad, for which he was reportedly paid 20 million pounds(DEAD), the super athlete puts his best……..uh……FOOT, forward. Honestly, David is simply just bein David…….flawless. I hates him………………just kiddin…………………….or am I?
-Z’maji, “Is that a high power black market handgun or are you just happy to see me………..back up dude!”
The Movie’s Rock event was actually kind of enjoyable, I mean actually didn’t want to kill someone for wasting my time. I really liked the performances as well as the ensembles. Suprisingly, Beyonce was toned down as opposed to the usual look of being attacked by a rabid cannister of glitter. Nicole was a dream in pink, Fergie was ready to be a Bond girl, and the Mary J was a majestic vision in white.
There are so many horrible sex jokes I could make right now, like “Sex & The City is upon us and boy have I been horny,” oooor, “Wonder how many people will be runnin through Samantha in the movie”, but that would be just sooo……..just so low class(tee hee). Soon we’ll be swimming in a sea of visual pleasure with Carrie, Samantha, Charlotte & Miranda back in the latest ’sick-nin’ ensembles and lustworthy Monolo’s……of course it is a new day so they might be in Christian Louboutins, watch out Monolo girl. Here’s the teaser trailer for the movie due to us in May of 2008. Here’s to 5 excruciating months of waiting for some Sex……celibacy is a ball breaker isn’t it.
-Z’maji, “I smell burnt rubber……..Samantha dear close your legs”
Who knew a dirty, filth laden junk yard could be so haute. I want a busted old school Malibu too, don’t you? Josh Hartnett broods his way through a stylishly simple editorial shoot in Vogue Hommes Intl. in perfectly tailored man-chic perfection………….all while breaking and entering…..how chic…..how elegant. Watch out Josh, those fabulous pristine white husky guard dogs are tryin to upstage your shoot, BEWARE OF DOG………Indeed!
-Z’maji, “Trespassing on private property has never been so faberluss”
My good homie from across the pond(Atlantic Ocean<read a book>), Zach Burns, or as I like to call him Burnzy, is model and promo team member for an exciting new brand in the UK named Perfectly Flawed. I love colorful hoodies and trendy t-shirts and there’s plenty of it from “PF”. What a fun beginning for this label, with an offering of plenty candy coated designs. Who said that all the Brits did was sit around sipping tea, munch on crumpetts and watch Masterpeice Theatre……. so much for them stiff upper lips.
-Z’maji, “The British are coming, the British are coming……and boy am I excited”
